I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry.

OR, A Summary of the School Certificate week (so far)
Did you know that standardised English spelling didn't exist till the 14th century, I believe, because of the invention of the printing press?
I shall proceed to post my account of the preceding week - when I can be bothered to. I have many a few photos Yes Linda, if you behave, I might post the one with you in the foreground. I can always post the one without you. (In fact, I'm not sure which option I picked...)
I hate not having constant access to social networking sites.
It looks like Mum found my stash of RAEGAHOL (tm); she can't stop shouting today. It looks like I've got myself a nasty case of inferiority complex. How nasty? I don't know whether or not this should go under angst, but still. Nasty.
English-lit: meh. Did you hear about the facebook groups? I FORGOT TO WRITE ABOUT RED EARTH.
Science: mostly skills-based.
Maths: I told you I didn't need to study!
History:  ARGH WE DID NOT DO A PRIME MINISTER so I just made an implicit comparison of the Vietnam War to the Iraq War. Also, it was the one with the highest knowledge-to-skills ratio.
Geography: It was alright. Most of it we'd already done in the trials. I still forgot loads.
IPT Skills Computer Skills: WTF IPT in my CS SC? It's more common than you might think.
Then we had "Chem" today. Min-Zhao had a small rant on attendance. Blah blah blah. Heat/light tomorrow.
Also, I went to Liverpool Markets on Saturday; I bought the necklace & a couple of bracelets there.
In sport today, because I was playing with the Yr 11 team today, I can't report on the Yr 10 team today (sorry, sorry); but still, we had an over of awesome. Ria, one of the Yr 11 girls, managed to get the team out 5 times, 2 of which were by bowling out. It was pretty awesome. I didn't get to run much today, because the Model Farms fielders were pretty darn good, but we won 25-8. (They usually get over 50, however.) Because the Yr 10 team won 28-15 as well, we're playing ourselves next week in the finals. BBQ, anyone?
In any case, try to get some of next year's Yr 9s in as well; our team's mostly Yr 11s and 10s, not that that's a bad thing, but some of the Yr 12s'll be retiring next season. Hmm...
Anyway. I can't think of what to say.

My First Book Of Autobiographical Stream-Of-Consciousness Stories Part 1

Now:
Really, this is...not really, well, maybe perhaps the first one I've actually posted on here. And I know this is insanely meta, because this is a story and all and I'm not going to put in where I've gone and edited bits back and forth in my head and well...what was the point of that insanely long run-on sentence? Ah yes. I'm getting ahead of myself. Yes.
This is a stream of consciousness story, or post, whichever fits better, where we attempt to follow - I say follow because if it went straight from head to screen it would be an incomprehensible string of half-formed words and thoughts - Fire up the thought engines! - so we're trying to minimise the whole "jumping tracks around my head midway" thing here. And hopefully it'll be in sequential sentences. And yes, this is part of it too. Did you think, maybe, these were author's notes? Well, the line's blurred, and so are many others. Enjoy while I procrastinate and angst at the same time.
Scroll down to the very bottom for the distilled, but slightly different version. It's a long way down.
Buckle up for a ride inside my weird, weird head. Like I said, autobiographical.

Failure to have a very nice day

(draw a card)
Playing Mao online is almost pointless. The deck'd run out quicker than the game.
Speaking - draw a card.
Oh, shut up, we're not playing Mao.
And since when have I been plural?
As the joke goes, the only people sort-of allowed to use singular "we" are royalty, pregnant women and multiple personality disorder sufferers, so which am I? I should hope none of the above.
Hmm. You, dear reader, shall have to work hard to shift the debris of my mental processes aside to glean any useful information (or not) about what happened to-day.
And no, I am not high. I'm a rollercoaster with a high potential energy.
Hmm, I suddenly feel like downloading "Not Fair" by Lily Allen from bandit.fm because I have so much credit left from all the chip packets I ate. Which is like a bell curve in the middle of a flat line parallel to zero.
OK, I'm just high (or low) enough to attempt cheering myself up by aeroplaning up the stairs and, you know.
Looks like I'm in the usual all-time low mode tonight. At least the past few weeks have been a fun social experiment. Not that I was recording data. You know, being cheerful for a bit.
Science? Who said anything about K________ being bad? The stuff I've heard about T's teacher is even WORSE. Yes, really.
Also, I've kinda given up on trying to be weird. I'M JUST THE [CENSORED] AVERAGE HERE. I just wanted to be special. No, not in the B(oard)OS way.
Why are you crying? No, I don't know why I'm crying. Sometimes it happens.
Why is the Internet so slow? I dunno, is it copper cables we have out here?
And in Ag, people pulled Kenny's hair for no apparent reason. And Kenny and Shelley and Jim and I were playing 1 1/2 games of Big 2. Mhmm. *nods head emphatically*
And I got 21/30 and Han got 14/30, so we're all happy. Except for Jim, who was one mark shy of 25/30, and possibly Shelley, who lost half a mark on something about record keeping.
But still.
Maths? Nothing much, except Ashley probably didn't feel too comfortable under the microscope today. I dunno.
Sport, it was alright. Being mobbed isn't too pleasant, though. And getting a ball kicked RIGHT IN THE SHOULDER just before the final whistle isn't too pleasant, either. At least we didn't get pwnt epically, we lost 1-0.
What do I eat, what do I eat?
Oh, and if you were wondering, I ended up having those weird noodles that come all wound up. Bit hard to explain. And then more Neapolitan ice cream.
Phys Olympiad was almost OK, even though Mr K______ said that this was all easy.
Then again, this is exactly the sort of stuff covered in, ooh, what was it, Chapter 7 of Science Focus 4?
Well, that was good procrastination(!)

Des vacances inutiles

Nothing happened much.
I have no idea where Anu's shopping trip is at at the moment. (Ooh, repetition. I like.)
Haven't done any homework. Unless you count several checkpoint questions and approximately seven lines on coastal management, none of which have anything to do with the case in point (it's a framework).
Haven't gotten any further in the writing of my novel, unless you count three poorly-researched paragraphs and reading a biography on Marie Antoinette ([spoiler] Yes, she's a relatively minor character. You can't really not have her in the book if a main character happens to be from that time period. Not by accident, either. [/spoiler])
I ran out of croissants sometime on Sunday, I think it was. There goes 5 glorious croissants aux jambon et fromage.
Haven't bought any clothes.
Haven't gone out with somebody.
Haven't optimised the source code for the blog.
Haven't told Dad I want a job.
Haven't told anybody in the flesh my plans for the novel. Or even that I'm writing one.
Haven't set out the plans for the novel.
[/list]

In an interesting coincidence, I was born on the same day as:

• 1995 – Former South African defence minister General Magnus Malan and 10 other former senior military officers are arrested and charged with murdering 13 black people in 1987, (all the accused are later acquitted).
• 1995 – Brandon Soo Hoo, American-Chinese actor, Tropic Thunder (was born)

...
And I haven't even got a job yet.
Way to go, Wikipedia, for reinforcing my inferiority complex. [/sarcasm]
What a funny date, Feburary the 29th. I'll not mention what happened on that day.
In any case, as I was saying before I got distracted, in a weird coincidence, I was born on the same day as the previously mentioned Marie Antoinette. Weird.
Any case, it's - will you look at the time, it's 3:07‽ [interrobang character]
Must be off. This will probably be my last act on the computer for the ostensibly Friday 16th of April.
Wait.
DOCTOR WHO'S ON RIGHT NOW‽
Also, yeah, I haven't congratulated the Euro trip people on returning safely. 
Now for the questions.

• Does Paris have cobblestones?
• How full of cars is the Champs-Elysées?
• Is it possible for a room to not have a view of the Eiffel Tower?
• Is it possible for an arrondisement ditto marks? 

Night, then.

Internet Backdraft Warning: contains profanity

Mood: rage. You'll see why below.

WHY DON'T YOU FREAKING ANAL-RETENTIVE D***WADS TELL ME WHY THE FUCK YOU HATE ME TO MY FUCKING FACE, ASSHOLES? IF YOU HATE ME THAT MUCH, YOU EITHER FUCKING DEAL WITH IT OR TELL THEM POLITELY OR MAYBE GIVE THEM A GOOD POUNDING DISCREETLY blah blah blah.

OK, I get the Linda Wu backdraft. Supercilious, maybe. Clingy, definitely.
But what I don't get is why the hell people (read: most other boys who aren't friends of other girls) hate me so much. Surely I'm not that bad?
No seriously. Why the **** is dancing with me so bad that you either a) dance with some other boy or b) mention me in a blog post in a tone usually reserved for Linda Wu in some corners of the grade? You know who you are. You were both in the same PE super-class as me last Tuesday. Bâtards.
Oh look, I need a tag for angst. Maybe I have bipolar. Maybe I'm just a tsundere kuudere person with mood swings (and accompanying mood whiplash).
But anyway. The Love "Meme" is highly recommended to make someone feel all fuzzy inside. You can find it here. So, at least the backdraft isn't universal.