Not Quite A Polemic, More An Off-Topic Discussion, Starring Me As "The Devil's Advocate" (Now With Quotes From Series 1 through 5 of Doctor Who (and Han)!)

Or, Ruse girls = slut-faced prostitutes, y/n?
Or, Someone Should Tip Off The SMH To See What The Public Makes Of This, If Only For The Troll Value
Warnings: Justified Bluntness and Vulgarity, also Blatant Lies (occasionally, and not part of main narrative)

"THIS WAS NOT WHAT I WAS EXPECTING!"

  - Rory Pond-Williams, on discovering that the "stripper" (no, not that one, the other one) that he hired was actually a ex-Ruse girl who'd accidentally worn "inappropriate clothing" and had been mistaken for the real stripper.

If you're a "friend" of Eileen, you might be able to read this: http://www.facebook.com/permalink.php?story_fbid=1828669367111&id=1551636765 . It has more intellectual value than this quick summary for posterity.

Also, in other news, (yes, it is first - reason under the cut...sort of) I have found out that France has a national "youth" channel. It screens Doctor Who, presumably dubbed.


Guide to Reading:
 When reading, insert the phrase "according to Connors, the DP" where appropriate. Actually, just insert after every phrase in which it makes syntactical sense.
 Why the out-of-context quotes? For shits and giggles, of course. Also because they make a hilarious amount of sense when quoted out-of-context (and sometimes inside proper and/or made-up context, too).

"This is the story of the day I died..."

 - Rose Tyler, on finding out that, by wearing, erm...what she was wearing here, she has not only been called a prostitute, she will be raped horribly, and worse, defamed the name of her elite private school forevermore. (Never mind that she's in a universe and time far, far away.) [sic]

So, my day started normally, with at least one strongly-worded "discussion" between Mum and one of us young'uns; me arriving later than David Xiong with a schoolbag and a few metres to walk (not anymore, 'cause he's moved closer to my place (hehe)); the attendance machine stuffing up randomly for Michael Reid; Prasad apologising profusely, I assume; and a double free period in the library, in which the overthrow of Birbara was discussed (there is a precedent, c.f. Mr Raj (not to be confused with Ms Raj), except it involved an assignment blatantly copypasted verbatim) by...other members of my 3U English class. Then I had recess, also in the library (finishing off Chem prac questions) and M.H., also also in the library, where we were researching the Sturmabteilung and the Schultzstaffel. You know, brownshirts/stormtroopers and the SS, parent company of Gestapo, Inc.

Then, of course, was the assembly. *insert scare chord from Psycho and dramatic thunder, in that order*
First off, a lecturing from Connors about "proper assembly protocol", then the awards. It turned out that I guessed correctly that it was for my "missing" Chem Olympiad certificate from last year, then blah blah blah Victoria's speech APEC blah blah blah sport news blah blah blah prefect news blah blah blah official party blah blah blah all boys may go to lunch but girls stay back blah. (Of course I was paying attention. I cbf repeating it, is all.)

Now comes the contentious part (according to Connors):
Connors: Blah blah blah inappropriate clothing mufti dance today's mufti blah blah short miniskirts blah blah high heels with cutouts blah blah blah *see below* blah blah blah no singlets, especially with "shoestring" straps blah blah blah no high heels blah blah blah no guys taking off shirts blah blah blah.
*omitted bit, presented here for dramatic impact:
"To put it bluntly, you looked like prostitutes."
*collective gasps of horror* *Linly snickers inaudibly in background, according to Connors Linly*
"The girl giggling in the corner there, it's not funny."
Blah blah blah ... blah blah.
"You may now go to lunch."

"If you turn up to Ag wearing stilettos, that's just stupid. Whereas if you turn up to a knife fight with stilettos...*thumbs up*"

 - Han, on what (female) ninjas use stilettos for. 

And then it was a ridiculously short lunch w/ discussion, followed by an uninteresting Chem lesson and 2U English w/ McFadyen, in which we looked at cartoons. And then I ostensibly helped out with the circulation desk and Mum was at Carlingford West Primary Uniform Shop.

Discuss and analyse Connors' PSA.
Really, was it worth it?